On the Indian Railways...

This was written on the same night as the previous two posts... its my take on what I thought is the impact of railways on the people and the people on the railways, i think...

00:20 4^th June, 2009

The train to Lucknow. Somewhere around Ghaziabad.

On the Indian Railways... A journey/lesson on Indianism

Outsiders/First timers are all hugely fascinated by the Indian Railways. Amongst the biggest rail networks in the world, it provides livelihood to hundreds of thousands and a life line to tens of millions.

A very remarkable person first remarked, “We are like that only” – an almost literal translation of a favourite phrase of the Hindi speaking hinterland “hum to aise hi hain.” – and what was once a way of life, of accepting the system and of projecting our many many idiosyncrasies to the uninitiated westerner, has now become the mantra of explaining away all the shortcomings & failures of our “great” nation.

This very phrase has become the embodiment of the Indian Railways which have very recently witnessed a “turnaround”, under the “able” leadership of Mr. Laloo Prasad Yadav (and earned him many accolades along the way.)

Which brings me back to the initial premise, what does it really mean to hail from India and to say, nay, to proclaim, to the world “We are like that only”

Adjusting, laid-back, non-complaining, patience, are a few of the adjectives that spring to mind for the average Indian, which I’m forced to concede, is a dying breed. Those familiar with the Railways of India, will agree that these are the characteristics (I use this word, for I am not sure if these can be counted as virtues/qualities in the India of today, especially given the rampant display of power, aggression and impatience though Roadies, Splitsvilla, IPL, and the plethora of “news” channels that are beamed into our homes 24x7) that are required in large chunks when preparing and actually using them as a mode of transport.

Whether the Railways are a true byword of Indian-ness or the latter results from the way of functioning of the former and many other similar public sector undertakings, is for the historians/chroniclers of India and her Railways to decide and for the reader to ponder. We can however, be sure that India, the real India, and the entire spectrum of Indians of various hues, shapes and sizes, (barring perhaps the ultra-rich and the infra-poor) can and will always be found travelling by its Railways.

On Musings...

This post is from the same night as the one on energy... i was in quite the mood for penning my thoughts down

23:40 3^rd June, 2009

The train to Lucknow. Pulling out of Nizamuddin Station.

A creative fit seems to have taken over me. And its weird that i'm trying to examine where this inspiration (so to speak) is coming from

On Musings...

What does it mean to muse over something? Is it an effort of the idle mind to make something out of nothing, or rather, sense out of the non-sensical.

And where does it stem from?

Emptiness seems to be key and yet the strange thing with the word muse is that it implies an inspirational source of the female form or its representation, for the artistically inclined (or should i say employed?)

And why is it only the female form? For an artist to have a muse of the fairer sex stinks of chauvinistic tendencies rooted in the evolution of our civilization. And yet you’ll never come across any feminist worth her salt to protest or petition against the muses or so to say the musings of the masters. Indeed, many would be proud of it that their creed evokes such passion in the minds of the intellectuals.

After, all creativity can stem from anywhere and anyone. My muse for this musing? If I told you it wouldn’t remain mine, would it now?

On Energy...

The following is a post I wrote a long while back, as a response to all my friends, who were constant critics of my easy-going approach to life. On a related note, I'm happy to report that my friends have not changed and still think of me the same way... :D

22:45, 3^rd June, 2009

Comesum Restaurant

Outside Hazrat Nizammudin Railway Station,

New Delhi

On Energy...

What is energy? Elementary Physics defines it as the capacity of a body to do work. But, how is it that when we extend the concept onto the human domain, we judge a person’s capacity for work by mere body language. Just being a fast talker or being aggressive implies an energetic persona!!

Why can’t we first look at a person’s work and then judge the energy levels. I mean, that how do you know that beneath a seemingly calm and dormant veneer of the external appearance, does not lie a highly charged mind capable of a multitude of innovative thoughts and the ability to convert those into hard reality if presented with the opportunity & challenge of doing so.

As hard as it seems to comprehend, the thought is simplistic in nature and once you think of it -- not very hard to get your head around.

It is my belief that the seemingly “low energy” folk are active practitioners of the principle of conservation of energy; keeping their potential locked behind the dams of a lethargic appearance and are waiting for the opportune moment to unleash it all in a torrent instead of letting it all ebb away in the daily humdrum of existence.

Guzaarish

I finally saw the movie Guzarish yesterday, after wanting to watch it for a couple of years now. A beautiful piece of work, it is for sure. But, watching the movie led me to an observation, about one of the songs on its soundtrack. Its a song that i've liked since the movie came out, but didn't really understand till yesterday.


Bas itni si tumse farmaish hai,
ye jo baarish hai, dekho na, ye jo baarish hai,
ismein mere sang... gungunana...


kal radio pe aaya tha jo, wahi waala gaana...
gaate gaate baahon mein mar jaaien....


bas itni si, choti si guzaarish hai...


A few of the most powerful words i've heard in a long long time. What surprising is that it took me such a long time to grasp the meaning and feeling behind these words, even though, now it feels like they were sitting there all the time.

They are a plea. A plea for Life to give one the simple pleasures and nothing else. But its not a happy-go-lucky song. Its not a Hai apna dil toh awara, or a Main zindagi ka saath nibhata chala gaya... Quite the opposite, infact. Many would consider it morose, morbid and depressing. But theres' a charm to it. The request for a life with a few joys and a peaceful end.

Isn't that something we would all want? Peace and happiness?

As a younger person, I used to wish for a lot of things. I still do. Material comforts are somethings that are quite important to me, but above all, on my wishlist are peace and happiness.

Bas itni si Tumse guzarish hai....

On Birthdays...

Birthdays make me sad. It wasn't this way before. As a kid i used to love my birthdays, 'cause birthdays meant parties, gifts and the attention of loads of people. They also meant growing up, and being able to do all the things that i wasn't allowed to do.

But now, when birthdays come, i feel quite the opposite. Yes, i still do love the attention, but gifts have lost their charm and the parties... well being a "grown-up" i can now party any time, there isn't a need for excuses like birthdays any more. But most importantly, what birthdays now make me realise, that one more year of the "best years of my life" has passed away from me. Birthdays make me realise, that in the past year, i haven't accomplished anything to be specifically proud of and that there is very little to look forward to.

In effect birthdays make me reflective and moody. It irks me that people want to wish me on a day that i don't particulary favor.

Its just another day, folks!!!

The Worst Thing...

What is the worst thing that you can do to a fellow human being?

A lot of things come to mind. Theft, murder, rape... the usual things that dominate our new headlines, both in the print and electronic media. But, what if I say no?

Don't get me wrong, i'm not saying that these things aren't bad. In fact they are the worst aspects of humanity, if it still exists.

But, i was hit by a realization this evening. The above are few of the worst things a person can do to another, but there is something worse by far and to my mind, the worst.

To make someone (especially someone you know, care for and/or love, or someone who does the same to you) beg for something that they desperately need. Think about it. That is something, that would utterly and completely, crush a persons' self-esteem, their confidence and most importantly the ability to put their trust in someone.

You don't need to kill someone to end their life. Just make them beg and you'll make sure that they stop living.

And its not even the kind of begging that one witnesses day in and day out on the roads, street corners and traffic signals of our great country. You know, the kind that one would resort to in extreme poverty, or the kind that people are forced into as part of an underground syndicated business. What i'm talking about here are the simple things, making someone beg for a few more minutes of your company, begging for a second chance, begging for a chance to meet you, one last time, for a job, for a chance to make a difference, for a chance to be counted, for attention... ad infinitum, ad nauseum.

There is one other aspect to it though. The beggar is scarred for life, yes, but the one who causes the beggar to beg (pardon the expression) is turned into a self loathing shell of a human being, once they realize the effect that they have caused. Melodramatic, but true.

It takes time for the realization to kick in, but when it does... well you know, as they say, Karma is a b/7c#....

The Silent Speaker

This post was written long back, sometime in November 2009, and first published on my Facebook profile as a note. Some of my friends would remember reading it. I don't entirely recall, why i'd titled the post as "The Silent Speaker" then, but i do remember, thinking it to be appropriate. It also seemed like the appropriate title to my blog, when i registered it around a year back, but never got around to posting anything.


I did however, keep on writing; bits and pieces. What i share from today onwards, is a result of those intermittent flashes of inspiration. Hopefully, they will be justified to the name and will express, the unsaid - allowing for once, the silent speaker to be heard.

--


It is a feeling that is indescribable...There is great sadness and great happiness as well...The feeling of leaving college and going out into the wide world. All these long years of schooling and college are finally coming to an end. Relief juxtaposed with anxiety. Relief that there shall be no more test or tasks or classes, and anxiety about the future, that is uncertain and dark. I am in my 20s and I know where and what I want to be in life. But I have absolutely no idea about what path I'm supposed to take to get there. Such is the complexity of life.

This contrast originates from the fact that even though I'm aware that I'm at the thresh hold of completing a major phase in life. I am yet to face the "real" world. Its as if I've been living in "j World" and due to a sudden mathematical transformation I'm about to start life as a new entity in "World". Now wouldn't that be amazing.

The funny thing is that the closer I'm getting to the end of the end of my education, the more I'm trying to stay close to its beginning. I'm reminded of my childhood nursery rhymes. The fun and games. I find myself drawn to FaceBook and YouTube; playing the games which are fit for children and looking at videos that remind me of how I was in my younger days.

As I'm examining this strange feeling, I'm tempted to find its origins. And a sudden realization hits me as I type; even though I am young in my years, I feel old, yearning for my childhood and the carefree days that were part of the package that went with it, sort of like the service provider that you get in the bundle when you buy a new iPhone.

Its probably what was referred to as an early life crisis a couple of years back. Only its earlier with no life whatsoever to speak of.

Still... - to quote from an upcoming movie... - "aal izz well" :)